Half a Dozen Handies for Handling Heart to Hearts

Can you remember when the last time was that you just needed to get something off your chest? Something you just could not hold in anymore. Whether it was how you were the one who knocked over mom's favorite vase, or how ugly you find your besties new favorite pair of shoes to be- it just had to come out. You feel like a horrible person for saying it out loud, but even worse holding your tongue! What do you do? How do you handle situations like this?

I've been here... plenty of times. It plays a number on your stress levels, and is like the State Standardized Tests of your conscious. Over and over you play different scenarios in your head, trying to figure out the best way to put it, but every time you think you are going to say it, you just can't seem to bring yourself to do it. So it sits in that frontal lobe of your brain, like a tumor, getting bigger and bigger with everyday you hold it in.


Here are Daily Dose's Half a Dozen Handies for Handling Heart to Hearts:

1. Mean what you say, say what you mean, but don't say it mean.
2. Nothing happens until something moves. Not doing anything will do exactly that- not do anything.
3. Bugs and wishes- It bugs me when you ________ and I wish you would __________.
4. Put your head in your stomach. Don't speak from your head because nine times out of ten, it will not come out nicely.
5. Speak from your heart- ground yourself before talking and think about only the key things you want to say. This way, it comes across very clear, not all mumble-jumbled.
6. Be yourself, stay humbled, always do your best, and as they say- God will do the rest.

Let me just emphasize that these things are not meant to be hard! It sure does feel like it, but they are not meant to eat you alive- they are designed as a test for the human conscious to see how strong it is. Although you feel like it is "like the hardest thing you have ever had to do, in the history of the universe," these things are put in our way in order for us to learn how to handle them. So then next time we realize that it is not a matter of what happened or how the other person takes it, it is a matter of just getting it out. Because in retrospect, it is better being the one who said what they needed to say and opened up that window of communication, than being the one who is unhappily, internally dealing with the problem.

It builds intimacy. Once it is out of you, it is up to the person(s) on what they will do with it. It could go one of two ways:

• You can either both say your peace, hug and make up, and move forward being stronger than before,            or
• You can say your peace, the other person pushes you away, and you move on being lucky that that relationship- the one that does not accept you being you- is not as predominate in your life any more and move on to find one that does accept you. And let me just tell you, that if a person loves you for you, they will push through it.

It really is that simple.

So next time a cancerous situation is overtaking your conscientious mind, just remind yourself that it is not the end of the world if you say or don't say what you need to say- it might actually be the beginning of a new one. One with or without this weighing on you. So keep your chin up, hold yourself high, and never hold yourself back from saying something you genuinely feel needs to be said. The person will or will not get through it, but once you get it out, it will make it a whole lot easier moving forward.



Stay True to You,
IotaDaily